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Monthly Archives: July 2010


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I just jot down briefly what happiness that made me feel high…

That Wednesday, when I went out with my friends I was so happy. I enjoyed that moment so much. But then when I realized that the next day the result would come out, I got damn nervous. Surprisingly, I pass! [HAPPY #1 – Pass the exam, even got DISTICTION for my chemistry, the lowest mark is CREDIT for Global_and_Indigenous_Public_Health]

The next happiness: *warning! SS501 related*

there is a poll from DKP site (Korean News), that are going to make a message book to A K-Pop group. At the very first time they (DKP) announce this poll, I just spread it and made it not-so-obvious. Because I as a Triple S, had to compete with other fandom. The scariest (at that time) was ELF. I gave out warning for my followers in twitter not to tell ELFs. First few days, SS501 were either 1st or 2nd place, competing with Super Junior. Then, I thought “mm.. good job” and I didn’t worry for the next few days. Until some day later, I saw DBSK won by about 2000ish vote. “Damn!” SS501 beat Super Junior but was defeated by DBSK”. 2000 ish vote? I thought it was undefeatable… I gave up. Until that Thursday HAPPY #2 – I saw the result: “DKP is going to make message for SS501 even though DBSK won the poll!” Isn’t that unbelievable? I believe that’s a present from GOD! Well, DKP said the reason was because DBSK members are not all together in Korea, so it would be difficult to give the message book. But still, that is unbelievable that there was such a reason to help SS501.

On the next day, ie. Friday. I was online in the evening. I saw a trending session for SS501. (Triple S was trending #SS501forever) What do you think happened? I, who was expecting nothing much from SS501, got the news that SS501 won a platinum award for their song “Let Me Be The One”!!! [HAPPY #3 – SS501 won an award] Once again, I thank God for this!!!  (Check the trending : Twitter #SS501forever trending)

 <– click here to watch to “Let Me Be The One” MovieVideo


That’s it, all that I can remember about the HAPPIEST MOMENTS IN MY HOLIDAY)



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I stare the future

Nothing I can see

Worry is my feeling

Anxious also beats together in my heart


Doubts and questions are building up

Start to calculate about chances and possibilities

Continue with anticipating the worst things


I wanna shout

I wanna cry out


Things we love

Could just disappear

While we just want them to stay

Things we hate

Just stick here

Forcing us to find ways to deal with it


Future… destiny… no one knows…

Gloomy Days

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Talking about the most remarkable event in those past 2 months, I’d say it’d be my exam and second place is Bible Vacation School. Why? Because they took most of my brain and heart. And here, I will tell you about them. I want to confess every bad thing I’ve done.

Uhmm.. I start from the exam time. Well, before that, you need to know I’m a twitter addict. (1st confession). Yeah, as you can guess, exam and twitter addict doesn’t go together. I mean, I know that during exam, I need to stay off from twitter and study seriously for my exam. During exam –that was held for a week- I decrease my twitter usage. But I still go online to some sites like facebook and so on. But this thing, decreasing my tweeting activities, was like a torment for me. (>.<) The day before the chemistry exam, I was just online and saw my twitter. My mind is already wandering about the time I finished my exam. So, I didn’t quite studying. Then… 규종came to TOK!TOK! (a place in SS501 official website to chat). @$#&! Great distraction! (>.<) ~Though he said something like “study hard for those who are having exam”, I’m not. I was totally distracted and after that, I was doing something about that (the TOK!TOK! message), either screen capturing or translating. I forget what. The point is I didn’t really study that night.

So I woke up the next morning, reviewing my lessons for chemistry. (Fyi, my body wasn’t feeling well that time too). I read and tried some of the question. Fail. I still cannot do those questions without looking at the notes. I went to campus after finished reading and doing a few questions. I arrived there about an hour early and started studying again. 12 o’clock, noon. That’s when the exam started. I flick through the paper.” Okay.. okay..I’ve seen this question… mm…”  That’s what I said in my mind when I looked the exam questions. Then, while I was doing the essay part, the one with calculation and stuff – not the MCQ ones-, I stuck. I forgot how I’m supposed to solve those questions. I just did the best I could; I tried to remember all I’ve studied in class. So I just wrote down what I remembered. I feel like I was “ngawur” (an Javanese term ~ I don’t know the English term for it). Once the exam time is up, I left the room feeling depressed and asking how were my friends doing didn’t help. My friends seemed to do the exam well. *sigh*

Later in the afternoon, my mom called and asked how my exam was.  At that time, I really don’t want to talk about it. I’m really depressed! Then sometime later (or a few days later ~can’t remember), my dad called and asked the same thing. Seriously!!! (>.<) I wasn’t in the mood if they talked and asked me about my exam! They wanted to know how I’m doing, but please, I know I’m going to fail that exam!!! Then what to say? “Dad, Mom, I think I’m going to fail…” huh? Then they would ask, “Why? How come? Didn’t you study?” then what? I would answer honestly? “I was trying, dad, mom, but I was playing internet all night. I admit I was tempted.” And before my parents could say anything I would say, “But I’ve tried my best to study. I prayed too, so God can help me study and put away all those temptation.” I imagined my dad would say this, “Danika, you know if you had a problem, you should tell us! Your parents could have helped you! When we asked you, you always say “okay”, “fine”. You didn’t tell us your problem. Now it’s too late!!!” I prepared an answer for that, “Well, when I think about it, dad, as I face a problem, I always think, “It’s my problem. I can solve it alone.” But when I realize I cannot solve it, then I tell you, and that’s already too late.

This is just what I thought. That conversation never happens.

Yeah, after my chemistry exam, I have my holidays. But my holidays weren’t fun at all. I was still burdened by my chemistry exam. My thought always remembers that I couldn’t do my exam. I always thought that I’m going to fail. I was really depressed. How bad? Ask my twitter friends! One day, I changed my avatar/profile picture to sad face. I tweeted some dreadful tweets. I still remember I tweet one like this, “suicidal thoughts”. Yeah, I thought about something that far. I thought about running away. (Because I am afraid to suicide).

However, I prayed a lot. I wanted to become closer to God. I thought a lot about life and death. (Still thinking about suicide and running away). I learn that the important thing is the life for the life itself. (Mat 6: 25-27) And about the faith that seeks God. I have thought this far. My mind was calmer by then. I was prepared for the worst. For example, I’m being taken back to Indonesia, then helping parents at home. Or I will just do whatever I can there in Indonesia, selling stuff, teaching, or just do any rough job. I don’t really care… My days passed, gloomy…

Then the Bible Vacation School fill my holiday. In Bible Vacation School, I’m helping and assisting to take care of the kids. There, during the lesson, my heart was touched. Mostly (almost every lesson) I learn something that strengthened me. Some that I remembered: (1.) God is a man. God knows our struggles too. God understand the pain that we feel. (2.) God is the Lord. He has the power and everything. Yes, everything! Those things that we worry are nothing to God. Thus, when we are God’s children, we shouldn’t worry. This Bible Vacation School has given me so much to learn.

Well, those dreadful days ended when I saw my result. I passed everything! Firstly, I seriously feel that “unbelievable moment”. For quite some time, I didn’t believe it and I was still scared. Then I know it was real, I was stunt for a few seconds. I was over the moon! Then when I returned to the earth, I was feeling like shouting. (But I couldn’t because it was about 12 midnight and everyone else was sleeping). So I was just jumping in my room and laughing. I tell everyone who was online at time that I pass (with full excitement). Then I called my parents. (Yes, it’s 12 at night calling people). LOL! I didn’t care much. I just want to spread my happiness. I want to let everyone feel my happiness too!

(to be continued to Happiest Moments in My Holiday)

SS501 Destination Mini Album

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Oh, geez! I bought the normal one without much thinking!!!

~Well, this is the latest mini album from SS501. (Really hope that this won’t be the last!)

This album contains:

  • Let Me Be The One (그게 나라고)
  • Love Ya
  • Crazy 4 U
  • 영원토록
  • Let Me Be The One (그게 나라고) accoustic vers.
  • Love Ya – intrumental

I bought the limited edition one, when it first came out. Because “LIMITED” is the most considerable thing to think!

Well, then after I purchased it…. (Hate DSP for this) DSP Media gave out the pictures from the normal edition. And I admit I like the pictures from the normal edition!

I never thought I will buy the normal edition, though, until one day, I went out and saw it in a store, here in Perth!

With a little evil whisperer to buy that album… Finally, I bought it! >.<

So now, I can compare the album myself.  I’d like to share it to you too!

Purple = Limited ; Green = Normal

Green = Normal ; Silver = Limited

Here’s some pictures from the limited edition: (There are still loads more!!!) ~okay, I admit I’m KyuJong biased)

KyuJong Destination Limited Edition

KyuJong Destination Limited Edition

KyuJong Destination Limited Edition

That one above is my favorite!

KyuJong Destination limited edition

The limited edition comes with the poster too, mmm… but too lazy to photo it. :S

Well, here’s the normal edition photos. Here are Kyu Jong’s photos in normal edition of DESTINATION!

KyuJong in Normal edition of Destination

KyuJong in Normal edition of Destination

There you go..

In my opinion, it’s worth buying the limited edition one. More satisfying. hehehehe.. ^^

P.S. :Those photos here are not all!

Be strong, TripleS !

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Double S and Triple S united (credit: Lynnette_vien@Triplechangjo_indo

Dear fellow TripleS,

I know some of you are still feeling down and sad about the news and rumours we’ve heard. Some of you may also just heard about this news. I know… we all feel sad. Such a hypocrite, if I say I’m not sad or shocked. I admit I am sad too.

TripleS darlings,

I think we should still see the bright side of this. Well, right now, I can see TripleS can support each other while we all are breaking down. Stay strong, TripleS! I can see in many TripleS bloggers posted encouraging words. Even not a bloggers, in twitter and FB too, I saw tweets that are strengthening in the middle of mourning tweets. I saw notes in FB that makes us strong seeing this moment. Some of us even chat personally through chat rooms, MSN, YM or email or other things just to make things a bit better.

Below, is a chat message from Mai Anh Nguyen from Vietnam with me. I just edit a little bit. Hope you guys also find this strengthening.

Mai Anh Nguyen: triple S,

Mai Anh Nguyen: now, I know you which feel: so sad, so tired

but don’t disapointed, don’t sad, please


Mai Anh Nguyen: SS501 need us more whenever.

SS say: they’ll be one  and stand by triple S always and forever and

SS also say that SS501’ll always protect triple S

Our leader also say that with him SS501 and triple S is the most important to him

We must believe in SS501’s promise, believe in SS501’s tear.

Mai Anh Nguyen: We must believe by our heart& by ourselves love

Mai Anh Nguyen: Not believe everyone and only believe SS501, only believe SS501 is the most important

Mai Anh Nguyen: SS501 promised with triple S that SS501 is forever and our oppa’ll do it

One more time, triple S beg to believe in SS501 always and forever because we are triples

SS501 is triple S’s heart

Mai Anh Nguyen: If have a day, all of the world don’t understand with SS501, TripleS still believe and support SS501 by all of our love

Mai Anh Nguyen: Triple S always strong

Triple S fighting

SS501 fighting.

SS501+Triple S =SSS

Mai Anh Nguyen: uhm

Mai Anh Nguyen: i want believe SS

danika: me too.

Mai Anh Nguyen: uhm

ika: Those news recently…

ika: has not been confirmed yet.

ika: I want to hear from SS501

ika: not those fan account

Mai Anh Nguyen: me too

ika: some people say it’s false

ika: some believe them,

ika: but I just want to hear from SS501 and believe it


Later at night my friend from twitter @Maisimus tweeted those videos:

credit: phtriples (Part 8 – Unbreakable SS501)

credit: bloomlion (SS501 5th Anniversary: Domino Project by Hyuniversal0606)

credit: phtriples (Part 6 – SS501 & Green Peas)

When I saw those, I cried. I cried seeing the journey that SS501 has been through. However, some are encouraging, when I saw the strength of TripleS when we are united to do some projects. Can we still stay strong like that?


I also want to share those tweets from Cal unnie:

” I know everyone of us is feeling down now. Well, at least, not too chirpy. 🙂 And I know, despite we’ve got love, trust and hope, it can be torturing for us to keep waiting and waiting and waiting.. Aside from that, we seem so helpless. I feel helpless too. But think, are we really that useless? Or we can put our love to good use? Now, let’s pressume all the rumours are true. 5 of them are in the midst of transition. Transformation. Evolution. And they are busy with all the nitty gritty details. At the same time, they worry for their fans – “Are they well?”, “Are they sad?” Again, assuming if they get to see us low morale. (Hey, rembr, @royalavenue @hyungjun87 is ard to spy.. Kekekeke) How will they feel to see us so upset? How would you feel to know that you have increased their burden? :)I know everyone is sad. I’m sad for JM, you are sad for HJL, she is sad for Kyu, she is sad for Saengie, another one sad for HJB. But time to wake up already. Mourning for a few days, ok. No problem.. it takes time. But being so depress, not worthwhile. Because you think back, what are u EXACTLY upset for? For the boys? They surely won’t want that. For DSP? Crazy for us to do that.. Lol”

(fyi, it’s 10 tweets) ~@violettacal

another tweets:

@violettacal tweet

~She also posted wise thoughts about this matter, check it at:



Disband still the worst thing that I could think of after those rumours and news. We should prepare for the worst now. What’s the worst thing? They go on with individual career, maybe?

What shall we do now? Fall apart? Let SS501 go individually with their careers and we do that too? We leave them alone?


Shall we stay strong together? We maintain TripleS together regardless SS501 solo career and support each one of them as TripleS?


Another thing I want to share:

What being a TripleS really means ...

credit: Michelle (@mjardz08 at twitter)

~Love ya~


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